Monday, May 7, 2012

Melancholy and the Infinite Sadness

Raquel is doing very well of late.
It's just those little bumps that drive us crazy.
She goes from doing somersaults on the couch showing off to her grandparents.  She keeps pushing the envelope doing them over and over, pulling giggles of amazement and nervous laughs from us all was we watch and guard the edge intently.  Then moments before she's about to go to bed, she's wandering around the house when she falls onto her knees out of site around a corner.  Luckily we did a diaper change as we were able to see what all the crying was about as she pushed off two patches of skin three inches in diameter which quickly filled with blood.

As Ren and I poked and snipped the corners of the blister to drained the blood, we were filled with a quiet 'melancholy and infinite sadness'.

I remember from my early 20's the title of a CD from the Smashing Pumpkins making no sense to me at all.
What can Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness actually be?

Sadly I think I'm beginning to know now.
(my spelling a little different than theirs)

It's there and always hanging over us and it's depth I'll likely never understand.
If I do it'll only be because I've out lived Raquel.


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